And that's all your gonna get, for now.
The other big thing is this, addiction.
I have learned that I am an addict. I have things in my life that I have a hard time trying to overcome, and while my addictions are perfectly legal they plague me. They are at the root of why I am constantly trying to change and live a more principled life. When our Savior said if your hand offends you cut it off, I think he was talking about the many addictions we find ourselves with or the things that may lead to one to falling into the temptation of an addiction.
My definition of addiction is this: Something you are a slave too, it feels like a part of you and as if you can't go anywhere without it. It owns you.
So with this understanding of addiction and with so many things that can fit into this definition, I have a lot of addictions. I find I am at my weakest when I am very tired, news flash I am always tired, therefore I am always susceptible. The worst is Saturdays and Mondays. Those are when I am the most fatigued. It helps to remember that when Christ was fasting in the wilderness, he was being pushed to the end of His physical limits and when he was at them satan came to tempt Him. I can gather strength from His example, when He was fatigued beyond where I am He resisted temptations. The other thing that helps is knowing that with His help anything can be overcome, so long as I ask for His help. The tripping point is me asking for His help. I tried the rock on the pillow as a reminder but the kids kept moving it off the bed. So I need to redouble my efforts. Eventually I too will come off conquerer of my demons.
That's right I didn't mention what my addictions are, we'll that's for me, God and the NSA to know (because they see and record everything).
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